The New Seekers

If you thought Debra Daley's scathing Melody Maker review of Nobody's Perfect was harsh on the album, then you ain't seen nothing yet.  In another City Fun extract kindly supplied by Mike Noon, here is Lynn Paul's take on The Distractions' only album (not for long...). We promised to bring you the history the The Distractions, so here it is, unique spelling included (at least they liked Mike's vocal):

THE NEW SEEKERS REVIVAL IMMINENT??

Our fearless correspondant [sic], Lynn Paul, investigates............

Music for pregnant mums, and other high blood pressure victims.  Music to soothe.  Music to lull - escapism.

This artifact [sic] you are about to hear bears no resemblance to real life.

Imagine if you will.... 5 musicians locked in a 24 track studio who have aspirations to follow in the 'mighty' footsteps of Sad Café.

Never has a title been so apt... 'Nobody's Perfect'.

As you are cocooned around this city in an orange and white bus, you will doze off into a world of clean dreams, and sliding into your dreams 'sound in motion offerings of escapes to exotic islands' with light orchestrations of popular hits.  Nesting comfortably with music for pleasure..... THE DISTRACTIONS.  Valium for the masses.

Different tracks on this debut album are indistinguishable from one another: a gluttony of 'Tasteful Arrangements', bland songs and Such 'Proffesionalism' [sic].

On the whole album there is not one spark of energy or comittment [sic].

It's pitiful to hear Mr Finney's excellent voice blended in with this mash.  Indeed Mike Finney is the only one who comes out of this project with any credibility.  Why doesn't he go and join a soul band like 'Q Tips' who are in need of such a distinguished 'Black Voice'.

I have absolutely no respect for the rest of the group.  Without Finney, the Distractions are a dull, unimaginative band of would-be 'musicians'.  Second rate trash like 'Interview, The Records' and their ilk.  Bargin-bin [sic] bands.

Not renowned for being the most pleasant of persons, this diatribe will be what is expected of me, but........ The Distractions have now reached a stage where they are surrounded by sychopants [sic], back slappers, and parisites [sic] like Brandon Leon, John Astley and Phil Chapman.

It's a shame.

This record 'Nobody's Perfect' is utter bilge.  Mediocre.  Mediocre.  Mediocre.  They ought to be downright ashamed at releasing such a innofensive [sic], trite M.O.R. record.

I just wish somebody they liked and respected would tell them so.

The Distractions  1981 entrants for the Eurovision Song Contest.... They make Prima Donna seem like Cabaret Voltaire.

Signing off.

Lynn Paul